When I was 8 my dad started carrying a beeper. He sported this hefty little technological wonder like a temperamental off-kilter belt buckle, its random screechings resulting in a little panic and a lot of off-switch fumbling, the messages I guess usually from God telling him no he didn’t have to stick out the entire sermon.
Now naturally I get a little misty-eyed reminiscing about gadgets from back in the day. Oregon Trail (dysentery!) and Number Munchers (Troggles!) on the computer lab’s Apple IIc’s. Mike Tyson’s Punch Out (King Hippo!) on the original Nintendo. My battery and tape eating Walkman. My Casio keyboard (Greensleeves!).
Of course I can’t miss you if you won’t go away. There’s not a doctor I know without a cell phone, and so naturally when I need to speak with one we dial their, um, beeper. Wait, what?
It usually goes like this: I tell the clerk we need to page so-and-so. She calls their answering service (answering service! madness!!) at which time it’s 50/50 the clerk gets put on hold. Eventually the clerk kindly asks the answering service person to make the doctor’s beeper beep. They call back at random times, or not at all, some beepers it seems have to be dialed twice before beeping. I’m held completely at the mercy of the system, unless I just absolutely truly require an immediate response, in which case I simply head off to the bathroom.
It’s not that I don’t get it. Beepers are a buffer, a way for doctors to protect themselves from their patients, the floor nurses, pharmacies, etc. For a doc to doc conversation though, how about offering up your cell phone number for me to call or text? There are hundreds of time sucks in the ER. Me wondering if your beeper has beeped shouldn’t be one of them.
July 8, 2009 at 12:55 pm
Um, my ER calls me direct. Easier for me too – if I get paged and then call back, inevitably the doc is not near the phone and I get put on hold.
Just faster for both of us if you just call my #%%^&%^*^$% cell.
July 8, 2009 at 1:18 pm
It seems like Google Voice could lead to some potential solutions to just this problem. With multiple phone numbers, they could be given you to specific groups, and each number could be forwarded to the mobile phone only during specific times of the day. Add speech-to-text, push e-mail, and email address aliases, and any physician could easily have complete control of who is able to contact them when.
July 8, 2009 at 2:56 pm
“Beepers are a buffer, a way for doctors to protect themselves from their patients, the floor nurses, pharmacies, etc.”
You seriously need to be “protected” from floor nurses? Are you afraid they are going to call you on your cell and ask if your refrigerator is running, or breathe heavily into the receiver? I wish I had the option of not having my personal home and cell phone number published on the phone list. But alas, I can’t be protected from those pesky nurses and doctors.
July 8, 2009 at 3:29 pm
Rereading…huh. What would make you think I have a beeper?
July 8, 2009 at 4:10 pm
Oops. That’s what I get for reading with a four year old on my lap during snack time. Multi-tasking. Ironically enough, I have to carry a pager/beeper for work. At least it’s a text pager, but I mostly use it as a paper weight.
July 8, 2009 at 5:20 pm
Our hospital is built like a cold war-era bomb shelter. No cell phone service except for little corners where you may get one bar here and one bar there.
Docs, however, may tell their answering service to just give out their cell # which we call, and I hate doing with a passion.
At least our pagers are digital pagers, so the doc get the patient’s name, DOB, and a message from the answering service.
PS Street Fighter!!!
July 8, 2009 at 8:44 pm
Our docs carry digital text pagers, so when we need something we text page them: “mr so&so needs a sleeper. Ambien 5-10 OK?” They call back with a yea or nay. It’s a lot simpler.
But I will admit that I like paging the residents at god-awful hours when they’ve been asses to the nursing staff…
PS…Mortal Kombat
July 9, 2009 at 6:51 am
We do the text system too, but they generally put what orders they want in at whatever computer they’re near.
July 9, 2009 at 7:43 am
My kids’ school still does Oregon Trail. And I still have no idea how you would actually win that.
At one point my doctor hated his answering service so much that he gave me his cell number. He said it would be easier for everyone if I just called him directly. I never did but my husband can verify the fact that once he gave me his cell number, I danced around like a fool saying “he trusts me enough to give me his real number. It means he doesn’t think I am crazy at all”. After which, my husband responded “he may want to rethink that based on your reaction”.
July 11, 2009 at 3:15 am
Frogger and Duck Hunt. Good times. A TV without a remote – just spin the dial really fast when Dad’s not in the room.
July 19, 2009 at 10:31 am
My ER has my cell phone, and I tell them to use it.
July 21, 2009 at 1:40 pm
Your beeper was washed away while you were trying to cross the ford. And your oxen have dysentery.
September 10, 2009 at 2:51 pm
I call the operator to page Dr. Icouldcareless. She asks: do you want him on overhead, long range beeper, answering service or cell phone? I’m like, do you really think I know where he is? Just try all 4. I thought this was the age of communication. Why is it so complicated to get through to people?
September 15, 2009 at 1:31 am
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