There is plenty of stuff in this world that is inherently recognized as disgusting and as such avoided.  Not too many of us I don’t believe would be interested in chewing on a piece of used gum offered from the mouth of a coworker.  Yet there are many other equally germy scenerios that we ritually engage in without so much as a second thought.

So without further ado, here is my official Top 5 list of Sneaky Disgusting Things.

Honorable Mention

Payphones
It is my understanding that there was a time when everyone and their cousin did not have a cell phone.  To make a phone call in public one allegedly had to follow a series of steps, which included finding the phone, having change on your person, inserting said change into the phone, pushing a series of grimy buttons (no contact lists available), and holding a germ stick, er phone receiver flush up to one’s face.  I’m sorry to have missed that era.

Fast Food
Work has been somewhat of an eye opener.  One patient tells me the kitchen of a popular Tex-Mex place is crawling with roaches.  Another comes with three days of diarrhea and foul smelling gas and asks if he can have a work note.  Where do you work?  (Fast food burger place.)  Uh oh, glimpsing into my future and seeing the ER bulging with patients in GI distress, here’s a stack of work notes, take all the time you need.  A third, who ways upwards of 350 lbs, says he feels dehydrated, when asked why he says the kitchen of a fast food chicken place is kept at around 92 degrees, so that he is literally drenched and dripping with sweat from pretty much the moment he clocks in.  Yum, I think I’ll eat in tonight.

The List

5. Pets
Dog licks butt, dog licks owner’s hands and face
Dog licks groin, dog licks owner’s hands and face
Dog drinks from toilet, dog licks owner’s hands and face
Dog eats its own poop, dog licks owner’s hands and face

4. Handshakes
What is the deal with these?  Why not just greet someone by sticking your hand in their armpit or up their nose?  This custom supposedly originated as a gesture signifying the absence of a concealed weapon, but with 48 states having some form of concealed handgun laws on the books it would appear that it has lost some of its effectiveness over time.  Interestingly, shaking a wet, slimy, or otherwise damp hand provides an immediate guttural reminder of the disgustingness that transpires.

3. Kissing
Becoming more intimate fuels a desire to engage in even more disgusting acts.  What’s the reward for a night out at the local Olive Garden and Cinemark?  The chance to spit in your favorite girl’s mouth and run your tounge along her partially digested breadsticks.  And, if you’re lucky, it just gets worse from there.

2. Keyboards
Would you eat a sandwich on the toilet?  A study found toilets contained only 49 germs per square inch, compared to the 21,000 per square inch found on computer keyboards.  Too bad you can’t use a toilet to IM.  OMG.  ROTF LOL.

1. Toothbrushes
I can’t believe we don’t think twice about these.  Somehow, I think the taste of toothpaste makes us forget that we’re sticking a bundle of nylon full of bacteria, fungi, and weeks old food particles into our mouths on a twice daily basis.  Plus, there’s always the chance of getting a pet involved.

Finally, a shout out to our immune systems, which makes a list like this irrelevant.  This is, after all, a medblog.